Too many people are not getting colonoscopies because they think they are painful or a nuisance. March was colon cancer awareness month and it was also the month of my 50th birthday. I posted about it and told everyone to go out and get your scopes. Being the cancer prevention advocate that I am, I thought I would put my money where my ass is and show everyone how it’s done. Little did I realize I would also be showing you the effects of Propofol (….yes…the Michael Jackson drug)
Routine colonoscopies are recommended beginning at the age of 50 to screen for colon cancer. Scopes can find pre-cancerous and cancerous lesions so that they can be treated early and potentially save your life. There’s really no better way to screen for colon cancer.
Your colon has to be completely clean for the doctor to see all the tissue. There are many different ways to get ready for the test. Different doctors like different preps for their patients. This was mine:
1. Only liquids the day before.
2. At 6 pm drink 2 doses of “the stuff”.
3. Crap your brains out.
4. At 6 am drink 2 doses of “the stuff”.
5. Crap the rest of your brains out.
I did give the doctor a tip about drinking “the stuff”. I learned this when going through my diagnostics when I was being treated for cancer and had to swallow contrast and such. Swallow a bit of honey or maple syrup first, then, using a straw pointed to the back of your throat, drink continuously until you’ve consumed all you’re supposed to. Then drink a bunch of water and if needed, another hit of sweet. He was very interested in this technique and was going to try it when he got home.
Here’s what happened in a nutshell. (Warning: there is farting involved)
My daughters are mortified that I am posting this. Some are saying I should be embarrassed, but I figure, if I can get you to laugh, and see what it is really like, maybe you will make your appointment and get screened.
OK. If you need more motivation than saving your life, the laxatives made me lose 3 pounds.
I am pleased to say that my colon is so clean you could eat off of it! I told the gastroenterologist that I eat whole food plant-based. He said he was sure this makes a difference in colon health.
I would be happy to answer any questions you have, but if you’re over 50 and you’re still lollygagging, take the gag out and make your appointment.